Life in the lockdown
Life in the lockdown
Kia - proud of her discipline - examines the effects of the Coronavirus on your state of mind
Yesterday I decided to close my laptop on time at 5 p.m. The working hours of my week had accepted a strange, flat quality: a superficiality as if I would step on my fins and hit sand.
I caught how I scurried from one task to the next and stopped in the middle to check the news, check twitter, check a tracker and then another. In this way, hours passed that followed more hours, which is why I promised to close my laptop on time at 5 p.m.
Four hours later I was still on my screen, scrolled, clicked, linked, sank.
It took me six days to apply the discipline to write this post. It hurts me to say that because I am proud of my discipline; on sand; on Lassen-uns single-time
I'm not neurotic or fragile. I went through too much shit in life to comfort myself through hands. You will not find me how I clasp my pearls or my fists Balle; I am too busy getting it.
alt = "kia in the telegraph"> India hobson/fair use kia has always imagined
There is a quote that I try to live: Discipline is the choice between what you want now, and what you want the most, and I was always good at sticking to it.
so far. I did not manage to concentrate this week or this month, because the pandemic pulled the ground away from me under my feet - so gentle and subtle that I hardly noticed it.
I was one of the wrong ones; Those who thought we should stay calm and continue, even when my income sank, even when the WHO alarm. Keep and Keep on, because that's the British way. But now I'm here and can't concentrate.
It is not the fear of the virus itself, but its aftershocks, which make me most worried. If you see where I come from, people don't have a safety net. You cannot call your parents for a short -term loan, you have no jobs that you can do from home, you have no buffer or bulwark or other euphemism to ward off a crash landing.
You can say that I move in three circles. The first is where I come from: Tower Hamlets in East London, which is largely occupied by workers. This circle is the circle of dinner ladies (my sister) and supermarket suppliers (my brother), Uber operator (my brother-in-law) and shelf truck (my nephew).
Alt = “KIAS neighborhood in Tower Hamlets”> I know Huang/Shutterstock KIAS neighborhood in Tower Hamlets
The second circle are freelancers, entrepreneurs and creative people who have become self -employed a year ago, five years ago, and slowly built up their company.
The third circle is that of the media set: authors, journalists and broadcasters who normally (but not always) have a safety net.
I'm worried about all three of these circles, especially about the first and the second. I am worried about the lost livelihood, the retrained houses, the increasingly thinner abyss, on which many of us balance. At some point, people can no longer afford a grocery store. This appears exaggerated for the elite, but it is a living, breathing reality.
I was particularly discouraged by the messages "Stay damn at home", which I saw on social media and who are usually published by people who can afford to stay at home. What they do not seem to understand is that some people have to go to work, some people do not have a garden, some people have psychological problems and have to do psychological problems (which is still allowed, by the way,).
alt = “buyers were said aggressively that they should“ stay damn at home ””> Alexandros Michailidis/Shutterstock buyers were aggressively said that they should "stay at home again"
It may be true that the aggression is not directed against those who have to dare to work, but keep in mind how my sister could feel if she reads on a layer of school "stay damn at home" when she enters the DLR.
As a commentator put it, it seems that "social distancing as one of these terms has entered our language, learned the educated liberal and then (one day after they have learned) how to swing a club against others. It has become a thing that they are down to poor people because they are not able to be as good as they are."
The call to stay at home can be made without aggression or coarse moralization or snappy comments about "natural selection in the course" paired with a picture of a supermarket snake.
They are the people in these queues - those who cannot retire to a country house or have their food delivered to their door - which I worried.
- Alt = "Richmond Castle rises above the city">
- Alt = "Looking at our hike in the Yorkshire Dales National Park move to the country">
- Alt = "switch to land path">
- alt = "The summit is shifting to the country">
Not everyone can retire to the country
After trying to write this post for six days, it became clear to me that I can't brutally struggle through this inertia. I can't sit at my desk and force myself to write a quote about discipline under guidance. I can't switch on my Freedom, put my cell phone away, make an effort and do things.
In my back of my head there is too much. There is worries and fear and dismay - not only for those that we will lose, but for everyone who stays behind.
alt = “Life in the lockdown”>
cover picture: Lijuan Guo/Shutterstock
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