A terrible day in Areguá, Paraguay

A terrible day in Areguá, Paraguay

With its lake views, cobblestone streets, and colonial houses, Areguá, Paraguay seemed like the perfect place for a day trip. Oh, how wrong we were...

In Paraguay we found ourselves in a rare situation: instead of having several weeks to explore the country, we only had days. Time and money were running short and we wanted to go to Brazil before going home. So we could only see one city outside of Asunción, the capital of Paraguay.

We considered the UNESCO ruins of La Santísima Trinidad de Paraná and Jesús de Tavarangue, but at 400km away they weren't exactly economical in terms of time. Instead we chose Areguá, a small town 28 km from the capital.

Areguá is described in the guidebooks with a variety of seductive adjectives: “historic cobbled streets” and “exquisite colonial houses” set among “green hills” with an “enviable location overlooking Lake Yparacaí.”

We read about the village atmosphere, the picturesque pier and how it has “attracted all manner of artists and writers over the years”. Sure, it was perfect for a day trip.

We arrived at the Terminal de Omnibus in Asunción mid-morning and asked a security guard where we could find the bus to Areguá. He sent us to the second level of the station. There we asked a ticket seller who sent us back downstairs. There we asked at the small tourist office and were sent outside and across the street.

We flagged down a passing bus and asked the driver if he was going to Areguá. He shook his head and pointed back to the train station.

Maybe we should have taken it as a sign that Areguá wasn't meant to be, but we persevered. As we crossed back, we spotted a bus with “Areguá” on the front. We ran between passing vehicles and raced to catch it. We managed to get in, pay and find two seats.

The bus was full, so we assumed Areguá was a popular day trip for locals, just as the guidebook said. We geared up for the 28 km ride and figured it would take about 40 minutes.

alt="La Candelaria de Aregua, Paraguay">Atlas & BootsLa Candelaria de Aregua, Paraguay

Almost two hours later we were still stuck in limbo on the bus. To this day we don't know why it took so long. There was no traffic and it wasn't like the cursed Ipiales-Quito bus in Ecuador that stops every 10 minutes to pick up street vendors. I can only assume that it entered some strange space-time continuum and spat us out on the other side.

After two hours I asked the driver again. “Areguá was 10 minutes behind,” he told me in Spanish. "What!? We have to stop please!"

He skidded to a stop and let us – just the two of us – off the bus. We were completely disabled. The bus had “Areguá” written on the front, we had told the driver that we were going to Areguá and it was supposedly a popular destination for locals, and yet we had somehow managed to end up alone on this dusty old road.

We walked 10 minutes back into town and stopped, confused. “Esto es Aregua?” we asked a small group of men huddled together in a square. “Si,” they confirmed. “Dónde está el centro?”

We followed their directions into the center and came across a small courtyard and a church. We had a view of Lake Ypacara but not much else.

“Is that it?” I asked Peter. “I think so…”

We considered going to the lake but couldn't get consistent directions and figured it wouldn't be great anyway. We drank a flat Coke in a tiny sidewalk cafe and took a quick stroll around town. Surely it had to be more than that?

old=““>Atlas & BootsLake Ypacaraí

After an hour we came across the slightly livelier Avenida Mariscal Estigarribia. This was clearly the tourist center. Had we not traveled two hours to get there we might have appreciated the crafts and ceramics a little more, but we were left sticky, exhausted and disappointed.

We spotted a sign for paella and headed there with growling stomachs. As we learned in Asunción, restaurant service in Paraguay can be confusing, and Areguá was no different. Upon entering La Cocina de Gulliver we found no one around. We waited patiently and then called out a few times.

A portly woman came out with a broom in her hand, completely confused as to why two customers were looking for food in a restaurant. We asked for menus, of which there were none, so we asked what was on offer. She walked us through a list.

We checked the price of paella and she said, “Noventa mil.” “Noventa mil?” I checked. "Si. Noventa mil."

At $15, it was a little more expensive than our budget would allow, but like I said, we were sticky and exhausted so we decided to treat ourselves. She led us to a table at the back where another lady came out and took our order. We chose the seafood paella.

Over the course of the meal we a) waited 45 minutes for our food, b) discovered that seafood paella comes with large pieces of chicken which I don't eat, c) our pitcher of drinks spilled all over us, our clothes and the table, d) were moved to a table directly opposite the toilet even though the restaurant was completely empty and e) discovered we weren't given any replacement drinks as there were still some in the pitcher.

Our polite British smile was in serious danger of slipping, so we decided to get out of there. We asked for our bill which came to an unexpected $40.

Now, considering our daily budget including food, travel and accommodation was $60, we were completely horrified. We rarely, if ever, pay this much for a main course in London, let alone a tiny streetside restaurant in Paraguay!

old=““>Atlas & BootsHandicrafts and ceramics

I asked why the bill was three times as much as stated. The woman who served us claimed that her colleague - who had now conveniently disappeared - had not told us that the dish was Noventa Mil, as it was much more than that.

There was absolutely no point in arguing, so we paid and left, feeling bad that we had paid multiples of what was already an extravagant price.

We spent the next half hour looking for the right bus stop back to Asunción. While we were waiting, we decided to check our photos when we realized that the SD card was corrupt. Sweating in the sun, we prepared to re-enter the space-time continuum, vowing we would never come back.

And that was our day in Areguá.

Lonely Planet South America includes a comprehensive travel guide to Paraguay, ideal for those who want to both explore the top attractions and take the road less traveled.

Photography: Leandro Neumann Ciuffo, Creative Commons

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